Discovering the Art of Masturbation

Since my last post was from the early parts of my life, and I am as much as I’d like to stay chronological, let me tell you the time I was starting to discover my body and the pleasures brought by discovering it.

It was around the time I was 12 when I first got the taste of how to reach orgasm on my own. I noticed how my pussy throbs every time I see a steamy scene from a movie. Sometimes just by kissing passionately, but always occurs when the kissing becomes a bed scene. My mom often covers my eyes when a sexy scene comes up, but this doesn’t always happen. And when I chance upon seeing it completely it steams up a sensation in me. Strangely I feel like my pussy moves on its own, opening and closing like a heartbeat. Sometimes it moves so fast my cunt gets moist.

When night comes I think about the scene I saw from the movie and relive it in my head. Again, the same throbbing sensation awakens and since the lights are out and I am under my blankets, I am free to move my hips and cross my legs tight enough to squeeze it. Soon I discovered that doing this in a jabbing manner as my legs tightens and lets go then repeating the procedure over and over increases the excitement. The heat encircles in me and I soon find my pace gradually becoming faster. As my hips move to the tempo, I feel my growing boobs shaking. To prevent from shaking the bed too much I hold on to my breasts only to realize that holing it makes my nipples grow stiff. Over time I learned that rubbing my nipples at the same beat adds more exhilaration. Then wetness builds up in me to the point that I couldn’t hold on to it and I explode! It felt almost like pissing but only in a very very small amount. I always hear my heart pounding so loud and hard after this that I fear somebody might hear it. Then I stay still for a few minutes as I swallow a big gulp of saliva stuck in my mouth. I guess this shows that while I was in limbo all my other senses stops.

For a few years after that I have this secret ritual before going to sleep. If I wasn’t able to watch a movie I make up a story in my mind. I have always felt guilty after that scenario, but I was so gratified that even if I prayed that I won’t do it again, I still do.

There was a time that I wasn’t able to do this for days, I think even weeks. I always stay up because of homework and I always fall asleep right away. One weekend I woke up with the urge of finally doing it again. I was aching to feel that sensation but whatever I think or imagine, it’s not waking up my senses. I was squeezing my pussy with my legs but I feel some sort of emptiness. So I stood out of bed and went straight to the videotapes of my mom. Where is that James Bond movie that has an erotic bed scene? I roamed around the house and saw that I was alone. So it seems.

I run through the videotapes again and I saw the one I was looking for. I hurriedly knelled on the couch and removed my panties, and since I just woke up, I was still wearing an over sized shirt. It felt cold under that shirt with nothing beneath. I sat eagerly upright and played the movie. I forwarded, searching for the scene and when it was familiarly near, I crossed my legs and started squeezing my pussy again. My cunt felt all moist soon as I hear the girl moaning and I would silently like to moan too, but I was preventing myself from making any sound. I was almost til my climax as my head felt like spinning and my eyes glued to the scene of two people fucking in the dark. I closed my eyes and replayed the moans in my head as I slowly felt my cum was all coming out of my pussy wetting my inner thighs. As I opened my eyes catching my breath, I hugged the square pillow behind me.

But just as I was getting comfy with my position, “Boo!” Angelo, my brother’s friend jumped behind the couch where I was seated! He was five years older than me and I was so shocked that I ran to my room as he was laughing trying so hard to conceal my panties inside my fist. My brother showed up from the garage and asked Angelo what happened. I didn’t care to listen to his reply as I locked my door and never knew if he saw or felt or knew what I just did.

After that day I swore I would never do that again. But I guess, time heals pains and embarrassments that until now, I confess that masturbating is one of my guilty passions.